My hubby started suggesting home schooling now and then, to which I would mutter something under my breath like, ‘then you do it,” or “bite me”. He would suggest it when we heard stories of school violence. He would suggest it when our daughter would come home ‘surly’. He would suggest it when he saw his friends with older kids immersed in the Sports Culture of Oklahoma. He would suggest it when I voiced concern over theories being taught as truth in schools. So finally after much stubborn resistance, I started to really think about it.
I remember coasting through school, never being challenged, and only occasionally being interested. I got good grades (many thanks to the curve), but I was confused. Mostly I unsure about God, the Universe and Everything. I stayed confused for a long, long time. I used to go to summer camp at Rawhide Ranch where I heard I little bit of the truth of Jesus Christ, usually at Wednesday night campfire. Afterwords, as I went on through life attempting to follow Christ, the Bible didn’t seem to jibe with the ‘truth’ I grew up learning; namely popular theories like Evolution, Humanism, The Big Bang, and ‘Many Paths to God’. I wonder if it would have been different if I went to Christian School and grew up with a Christian World View instead of a Secular World View? I am certain it would have been; my old world view is still baggage I carry!
As soon as I became a Mom, I knew that my number one goal in parenting was to impart faith in Jesus Christ to my kids. I do not want them on the long hard and brokenhearted road to nowhere I traveled before I finally chose the narrow path. I love them more than life, why would I not illuminate the path I hope they will choose to walk?
As second grade began, I began thinking more and more about how on I could ensure my daughter learned the truth when she was away from me from 8 hours every day. When she gets home she doesn’t want to spend the remaining 4 hours until bedtime with me (which stinks because I want to spend it with her). She wants to play outside and with her friends!
Our town has great schools as far as public schools go, but I really have had no clue what is going on since day one. I want my kids to learn the truth of the history of our great nation and its founding fathers. The more I research, the more I realize that doesn’t happen at public school anymore. I want my children to be taught Biblical and historical truth. And that Truth exists!
I see my friends with older kids constantly shuttling kids from different schools to different sports practices and games. They have nary a moment to breath, let alone to pass on wisdom, or teach by example or have a deep conversation or enjoy a meal around the table as a family. We are not there yet but we are on the same train! I realized it is not too late. It’s not going so fast we can’t jump off (and even if it were –we could still jump – I just reckon it would hurt a bit more)!
After much of research and prayer and getting that peaceful easy feeling that comes from on High. I have become certain that at this time, this is God’s will for OUR FAMILY. We are jumping off the train. =)
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
What I heard in the Word...
Just a few days ago I finally made good on my promise to start journaling as I read my Bible. Yesterday was the most special time spent in the Word I have ever had. I have never quite had a Bible reading experience like this before. This is in no way intended as a political commentary. Please don’t interpret it as such. I just wanted to share my experience in God's Word.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yesterday before I sat down to read my One Year Bible, I began to pour out my heart telling God what He already knows is on my heart. I wrote as I prayed:
“I am so afraid about the political situation – I know I shouldn’t be—to God be the Glory! I should be trusting Him! I am praying our nation would turn back to her godly origins and that as a nation we would repent. I am praying that God will deliver us from this president (who I know He is using as His pawn!) and from the Hellish agenda. I am afraid of the future of/in this nation for those that love God and I’m praying that I (and my family) would be faithful. It is terrifying that the President has his eye on my precious boys. Please Lord help me train them up in the way they should go. Please Lord hold my kiddos tightly. Engrave us on Your palm!”
In Isaiah 49 God says “See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands...” I have loved the phrase since first hearing it… the idea that God holds on to us so tightly that we are etched onto his palm…marvelous!"
After jotting down my heartfelt prayer in complete distress, I began to read from the One Year Bible (that’s the New Living Translation, by the way). I am currently a day behind – and don’t go thinking, ‘wow, she is disciplined’ – I started in early November. This is my first attempt (without giving up!?) to read the entire Bible and my first time reading Isaiah.
Isaiah 51 began by grabbing my attention “Listen to me, all who hope for deliverance – all who seek the Lord!” I just prayed for deliverance!
Now I am no Bible scholar, but I count myself among God’s chosen people. I believe that when we gentiles choose to accept God’s free gift of salvation through Christ, we are ‘grafted’ into His family tree. So when the Bible says, ‘Yo Abraham!’ ‘Hey Jacob!’ ‘Yo Israel!’ or ‘Hey Zion!’ I am all ears.
I read on…
“4 “Listen to me, my people.
Hear me, Israel,
for my law will be proclaimed,
and my justice will become a light to the nations.
5 My mercy and justice are coming soon.
My salvation is on the way.
My strong arm will bring justice to the nations.
All distant lands will look to me
and wait in hope for my powerful arm.
At this point I copied those verses down in my journal and wrote prayerfully, “Lord, I am waiting in hope for your powerful arm!”
Then in verse 6 God reminded me to keep my eye to the sky! That this is earthly life is not where my focus should be.
In verse 7 I was reminded of my fear of reproach from my non-Christian friends (not that any of them have done or said a single thing to deserve this, this is just a major issue for me personally…and in part why I felt I should go ahead and post this since I really felt like sharing it).
In verse 9, I heard my own plea repeated, “Wake up, wake up, O LORD! Clothe yourself with strength! Flex your mighty right arm!”
In verses 12-16 God continued to speak straight to my heart. He reminded me that He is my comforter. This was especially touching because of the sweet reprieve God has given me over the last couple days, even while our home is still wracked with illnesses, the dark feeling of despair is gone. I have been filled with hope! Then He lovingly addressed my fear and overwhelming dread about our nation's leader. He called me out on my fear of man, reminding me that He is the Creator and the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. He reminds me that He will (and has already) overcome the world. Most precious of all, verse 16, He reminded me that, just as I had asked, He has hidden me safely in his hand!
12 “I, yes I, am the one who comforts you.
So why are you afraid of mere humans,
who wither like the grass and disappear?
13 Yet you have forgotten the LORD, your Creator,
the one who stretched out the sky like a canopy
and laid the foundations of the earth.
Will you remain in constant dread of human oppressors?
Will you continue to fear the anger of your enemies?
Where is their fury and anger now?
It is gone!
14 Soon all you captives will be released!
Imprisonment, starvation, and death will not be your fate!
15 For I am the LORD your God,
who stirs up the sea, causing its waves to roar.
My name is the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.
16 And I have put my words in your mouth
and hidden you safely in my hand.
I stretched out[d] the sky like a canopy
and laid the foundations of the earth.
I am the one who says to Israel,
‘You are my people!’”
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yesterday before I sat down to read my One Year Bible, I began to pour out my heart telling God what He already knows is on my heart. I wrote as I prayed:
“I am so afraid about the political situation – I know I shouldn’t be—to God be the Glory! I should be trusting Him! I am praying our nation would turn back to her godly origins and that as a nation we would repent. I am praying that God will deliver us from this president (who I know He is using as His pawn!) and from the Hellish agenda. I am afraid of the future of/in this nation for those that love God and I’m praying that I (and my family) would be faithful. It is terrifying that the President has his eye on my precious boys. Please Lord help me train them up in the way they should go. Please Lord hold my kiddos tightly. Engrave us on Your palm!”
In Isaiah 49 God says “See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands...” I have loved the phrase since first hearing it… the idea that God holds on to us so tightly that we are etched onto his palm…marvelous!"
After jotting down my heartfelt prayer in complete distress, I began to read from the One Year Bible (that’s the New Living Translation, by the way). I am currently a day behind – and don’t go thinking, ‘wow, she is disciplined’ – I started in early November. This is my first attempt (without giving up!?) to read the entire Bible and my first time reading Isaiah.
Isaiah 51 began by grabbing my attention “Listen to me, all who hope for deliverance – all who seek the Lord!” I just prayed for deliverance!
Now I am no Bible scholar, but I count myself among God’s chosen people. I believe that when we gentiles choose to accept God’s free gift of salvation through Christ, we are ‘grafted’ into His family tree. So when the Bible says, ‘Yo Abraham!’ ‘Hey Jacob!’ ‘Yo Israel!’ or ‘Hey Zion!’ I am all ears.
I read on…
“4 “Listen to me, my people.
Hear me, Israel,
for my law will be proclaimed,
and my justice will become a light to the nations.
5 My mercy and justice are coming soon.
My salvation is on the way.
My strong arm will bring justice to the nations.
All distant lands will look to me
and wait in hope for my powerful arm.
At this point I copied those verses down in my journal and wrote prayerfully, “Lord, I am waiting in hope for your powerful arm!”
Then in verse 6 God reminded me to keep my eye to the sky! That this is earthly life is not where my focus should be.
In verse 7 I was reminded of my fear of reproach from my non-Christian friends (not that any of them have done or said a single thing to deserve this, this is just a major issue for me personally…and in part why I felt I should go ahead and post this since I really felt like sharing it).
In verse 9, I heard my own plea repeated, “Wake up, wake up, O LORD! Clothe yourself with strength! Flex your mighty right arm!”
In verses 12-16 God continued to speak straight to my heart. He reminded me that He is my comforter. This was especially touching because of the sweet reprieve God has given me over the last couple days, even while our home is still wracked with illnesses, the dark feeling of despair is gone. I have been filled with hope! Then He lovingly addressed my fear and overwhelming dread about our nation's leader. He called me out on my fear of man, reminding me that He is the Creator and the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. He reminds me that He will (and has already) overcome the world. Most precious of all, verse 16, He reminded me that, just as I had asked, He has hidden me safely in his hand!
12 “I, yes I, am the one who comforts you.
So why are you afraid of mere humans,
who wither like the grass and disappear?
13 Yet you have forgotten the LORD, your Creator,
the one who stretched out the sky like a canopy
and laid the foundations of the earth.
Will you remain in constant dread of human oppressors?
Will you continue to fear the anger of your enemies?
Where is their fury and anger now?
It is gone!
14 Soon all you captives will be released!
Imprisonment, starvation, and death will not be your fate!
15 For I am the LORD your God,
who stirs up the sea, causing its waves to roar.
My name is the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.
16 And I have put my words in your mouth
and hidden you safely in my hand.
I stretched out[d] the sky like a canopy
and laid the foundations of the earth.
I am the one who says to Israel,
‘You are my people!’”
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
MOPS – What’s the point?
MOPS stands for Mothers of Pre-Schoolers (that’s moms of from newborn to kindergarten). But what is MOPS all about? MOPS is about bringing Moms closer to Jesus Christ. Moms of little ones are in a unique period of life, with its own unique struggles and sometimes intense feeling of aloneness, much of which eventually fade into memories of cherished chubby cheeked cherubs. But when you are in it, you are IN IT. It’s a time of life when that God-shaped hole in our heart cries out to be filled. Lost moms are ready to be found! Whether it is because they have no clue about God’s free gift of salvation, because they’ve wandered from the path, or because they are just going through the motions; lost moms are ready to be found. When a lost mom is found all of Heaven rejoices. And just think — due to her influence on her family — of all the potential for celebration!!
Why come to MOPS when I am not lost? A MOPS group needs Moms who love Jesus, who are willing to reach out — just across the table — to a mom who needs a shoulder, a hug, a friend, and the Savior.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Looking back at my first MOPS
In early 2003 my family moved to OKC from T-town, my hubby and I had a 6 month old baby girl and we didn’t know a soul. We’d been married 8 years and we’d only gone to church a handful times. Mostly we were uncomfortable and intimidated. Andy was disillusioned about Christianity due to the party-tonight-repent-tomorrow attitude of the church he grew up in and I had asked Jesus into my heart at countless campfires at Rawhide Ranch camp when I was a kid, but basically I was confused and lost, and I had a longing to raise my daughter so that she wouldn’t be.
When we moved here, my husband was taking a new job and I was beginning my new career as a stay-at-home mom. I wanted to meet other moms. My mom told me about MOPS (a neighbor had told her about it), so I looked it up online, and found Metropolitan MOPS.
I found MOPS to be warm and welcoming… and the speakers inspiring. My daughter was lovingly rocked by a precious MOPPETS worker. It was her first time away from me and though it was hard for both of us, I was felt comfortable that she was secure and loved. The meeting was great. I think I painted a picture frame –that still, six years later, proudly displays a picture of our family in her room. We munched on breakfast and heard a dear lady share about friendship. I was eventually invited to my first Bible Study by someone in my small group, and within a few months, our family began attending church at MBC. Our lives have changed so much for the better, we have grown so much here! I pray that God will keep on growing us into a closer relationship with Him. And I believe He will!
You know what? My story is not unique! Last Year, six MOPS Moms came to a Bible Study on Thursday mornings. For at least one, it was the first one she’d ever been to. God uses MOPS to draw Moms to Him. And I am sooo thankful!
When we moved here, my husband was taking a new job and I was beginning my new career as a stay-at-home mom. I wanted to meet other moms. My mom told me about MOPS (a neighbor had told her about it), so I looked it up online, and found Metropolitan MOPS.
I found MOPS to be warm and welcoming… and the speakers inspiring. My daughter was lovingly rocked by a precious MOPPETS worker. It was her first time away from me and though it was hard for both of us, I was felt comfortable that she was secure and loved. The meeting was great. I think I painted a picture frame –that still, six years later, proudly displays a picture of our family in her room. We munched on breakfast and heard a dear lady share about friendship. I was eventually invited to my first Bible Study by someone in my small group, and within a few months, our family began attending church at MBC. Our lives have changed so much for the better, we have grown so much here! I pray that God will keep on growing us into a closer relationship with Him. And I believe He will!
You know what? My story is not unique! Last Year, six MOPS Moms came to a Bible Study on Thursday mornings. For at least one, it was the first one she’d ever been to. God uses MOPS to draw Moms to Him. And I am sooo thankful!
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
way too quiet
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
My Complete Lack of a Spiritual Birthday
ack. my friend Bubbles said " I'm definitely interested in hearing your testimony when you have a free minute." and now she can read it when she has a free half hour! hahahaha. =)
I wonder how many people are like me and cringe when people ask about when they came to know Christ as their Savior because they don't really remember the exact moment. When people mention their "Spiritual Birthday" I am exasperated, because I don't think I have one! I wonder if I did it all wrong!
I have always felt like I didn't have a real "faith story". I am beginning to think that I am doing a disservice to Christ and to others who feel like I do by not sharing it anyway! And I have been asked this a couple times in the last few days so maybe I better get better at telling it!
When I was a kid I went to Summer Camp at Rawhide Ranch. Wednesday Night Campfires always started out great.. I loved singing the praise songs, and listening to the stories. Every week when they'd say the prayer to ask Jesus into your heart, I would always say it, but afterward when they would ask you to raise your hand... I never would. I am not sure what it was about that, but that always frightened me. I honestly don't remember talking to my counselor about it. I am not saying I didn't.. just saying I have very foggy/selective memories.
I know sometime when I was a kid I bought myself a Bible. Probably when I got home from camp. I am not sure if I was saved by then. And that has always been the hardest part for me. Most of my life I have been unsure about my salvation. Why was it so hard to accept such a glorious free gift?
Most of the time I felt lost, confused, befuddled, or all three. When I was in High School, I joined the Mormon church. For, I think, three main reasons. First and foremost, I recognized Jesus Christ, as the beautiful Jesus I heard about at Rawhide. Second, the people were very loving and embraced me, so for a time I did not feel so lost, it felt like a family. Third, the Mormons I knew could clearly answer any question I had about their faith. I like to understand things and I like things to make sense. One of the "guarantees" the Mormon church gave was that if you read the Book of Mormon and prayed about it, you could "know" if it was true. Although I read it and prayed this prayer, I did not know. I just believed and hoped. I went to BYU for a year. And basically began to feel tons of guilt about not "knowing". It must be because I am not be being good enough. Their was a tremendous weight on works, and not so much on grace. The summer after that I "fell away". I went back to a Mormon church once. And although I waited to speak to missionaries I had never met, and waited where the asked visitors to wait to be greeted. No one greeted me. I figured this was a "sign" I was in the wrong place. The next part of my life is saddest and most painful to look back at part. I had been a pretty 'good girl" up until then, and had been pretty prideful about it.
Basically, I quickly fell into a sinful and lost life. One of the biggest mistakes I made was putting the characteristics of my earthly imperfect father on my Perfect Heavenly Father. If you asked me about my relationship with God I probably would have told you "we aren't really speaking right now."
Apparently my brother, Mike had some awesome counselors at camp, because he "got it right" the first time. I can remember that even when I was a Mormon, my brother was (and is) one of the most amazing Christians I had ever met.
When I was dating my Husband I remember that he was concerned about my salvation. Thankfully he married me anyway. =) Mike gave us a Bible for our wedding gift. Once again I would go on "bouts" of daily reading. Determined to earn Faith in God through a regimen of reading. I was not reading with an open heart. I was appalled that David was God's Chosen King when he was such a horrible creep! I would basically read the Old Testament until I was frustrated and angry and basically throw in the towel. If I read the new testament I would eventually just start hearing "blah blah blah" as things would go beyond my understanding. We tried to find a church in when we were first married. After a few tries, the experience ended with me in tears saying "never make me go to church again"... even though it had been my idea. =P
Over the years, I was slowly growing my relationship with the Lord, thanks almost exclusively to my amazing brother and sister-in-law, and God's faithfulness. He would not give up on me no matter how many times I gave up on him. Since we did not go to church and most of our closest family are either not Christians or have quit making God a priority in their life, Mike and Holli were my only real life examples of people living for the Lord.
After 8 years of marriage, Andy and I finally decided to start a family.
Children changed my life and amazingly brought me to the Lord's feet. I could not bare for my daughter to struggle with her faith like I had all of my life. I didn't want her to feel my despair. I knew I could not allow this to continue for me or my daughter.
After our sweet girl was born I started reading a commentary that Mike recommended. Jon Courson's Application Commentary. God's Word was suddenly brought to life in a way I had never experienced before. I actually looked forward to reading it! I was learning and growing as I read.
We moved to OKC before our baby girl's first birthday. In Oklahoma City, I found MoPs. MoPs was a huge encouragement to me, and the other ladies I met their encouraged me to join a Bible Study. Within a year we started attending Metropolitan Church as a family. Shortly, thereafter Grampa John in Florida took a downward spiral and Mike and I went out there and brought him back to Oklahoma. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done and at the same time best experiences of my life. For the first time in my life I truly felt God was holding me in the palm of his hand. (that story needs to be another blog).
Shortly thereafter we started attending Sunday school. For the first time in my life I am part of a loving Bible-Teaching-Church family. It's been wonderful.
I am sure now that my purpose (and all our purposes) is to glorify the Lord. And more specifically, for me, it is to bring my children up to know and love Him, and I have his promise that if I "train them up in the way they should go, when they are old they will not depart from it."
I am not sure exactly when it happened, but I can say that Jesus Christ is my savior. He bore my sin on the cross. He died and was raised from the dead three days later. I am saved only by His grace, and not by anything I could ever do, other than trusting in Him. Thank the Lord!
....
well there it is, the short version!
thanks for asking. =P
I wonder how many people are like me and cringe when people ask about when they came to know Christ as their Savior because they don't really remember the exact moment. When people mention their "Spiritual Birthday" I am exasperated, because I don't think I have one! I wonder if I did it all wrong!
I have always felt like I didn't have a real "faith story". I am beginning to think that I am doing a disservice to Christ and to others who feel like I do by not sharing it anyway! And I have been asked this a couple times in the last few days so maybe I better get better at telling it!
When I was a kid I went to Summer Camp at Rawhide Ranch. Wednesday Night Campfires always started out great.. I loved singing the praise songs, and listening to the stories. Every week when they'd say the prayer to ask Jesus into your heart, I would always say it, but afterward when they would ask you to raise your hand... I never would. I am not sure what it was about that, but that always frightened me. I honestly don't remember talking to my counselor about it. I am not saying I didn't.. just saying I have very foggy/selective memories.
I know sometime when I was a kid I bought myself a Bible. Probably when I got home from camp. I am not sure if I was saved by then. And that has always been the hardest part for me. Most of my life I have been unsure about my salvation. Why was it so hard to accept such a glorious free gift?
Most of the time I felt lost, confused, befuddled, or all three. When I was in High School, I joined the Mormon church. For, I think, three main reasons. First and foremost, I recognized Jesus Christ, as the beautiful Jesus I heard about at Rawhide. Second, the people were very loving and embraced me, so for a time I did not feel so lost, it felt like a family. Third, the Mormons I knew could clearly answer any question I had about their faith. I like to understand things and I like things to make sense. One of the "guarantees" the Mormon church gave was that if you read the Book of Mormon and prayed about it, you could "know" if it was true. Although I read it and prayed this prayer, I did not know. I just believed and hoped. I went to BYU for a year. And basically began to feel tons of guilt about not "knowing". It must be because I am not be being good enough. Their was a tremendous weight on works, and not so much on grace. The summer after that I "fell away". I went back to a Mormon church once. And although I waited to speak to missionaries I had never met, and waited where the asked visitors to wait to be greeted. No one greeted me. I figured this was a "sign" I was in the wrong place. The next part of my life is saddest and most painful to look back at part. I had been a pretty 'good girl" up until then, and had been pretty prideful about it.
Basically, I quickly fell into a sinful and lost life. One of the biggest mistakes I made was putting the characteristics of my earthly imperfect father on my Perfect Heavenly Father. If you asked me about my relationship with God I probably would have told you "we aren't really speaking right now."
Apparently my brother, Mike had some awesome counselors at camp, because he "got it right" the first time. I can remember that even when I was a Mormon, my brother was (and is) one of the most amazing Christians I had ever met.
When I was dating my Husband I remember that he was concerned about my salvation. Thankfully he married me anyway. =) Mike gave us a Bible for our wedding gift. Once again I would go on "bouts" of daily reading. Determined to earn Faith in God through a regimen of reading. I was not reading with an open heart. I was appalled that David was God's Chosen King when he was such a horrible creep! I would basically read the Old Testament until I was frustrated and angry and basically throw in the towel. If I read the new testament I would eventually just start hearing "blah blah blah" as things would go beyond my understanding. We tried to find a church in when we were first married. After a few tries, the experience ended with me in tears saying "never make me go to church again"... even though it had been my idea. =P
Over the years, I was slowly growing my relationship with the Lord, thanks almost exclusively to my amazing brother and sister-in-law, and God's faithfulness. He would not give up on me no matter how many times I gave up on him. Since we did not go to church and most of our closest family are either not Christians or have quit making God a priority in their life, Mike and Holli were my only real life examples of people living for the Lord.
After 8 years of marriage, Andy and I finally decided to start a family.
Children changed my life and amazingly brought me to the Lord's feet. I could not bare for my daughter to struggle with her faith like I had all of my life. I didn't want her to feel my despair. I knew I could not allow this to continue for me or my daughter.
After our sweet girl was born I started reading a commentary that Mike recommended. Jon Courson's Application Commentary. God's Word was suddenly brought to life in a way I had never experienced before. I actually looked forward to reading it! I was learning and growing as I read.
We moved to OKC before our baby girl's first birthday. In Oklahoma City, I found MoPs. MoPs was a huge encouragement to me, and the other ladies I met their encouraged me to join a Bible Study. Within a year we started attending Metropolitan Church as a family. Shortly, thereafter Grampa John in Florida took a downward spiral and Mike and I went out there and brought him back to Oklahoma. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done and at the same time best experiences of my life. For the first time in my life I truly felt God was holding me in the palm of his hand. (that story needs to be another blog).
Shortly thereafter we started attending Sunday school. For the first time in my life I am part of a loving Bible-Teaching-Church family. It's been wonderful.
I am sure now that my purpose (and all our purposes) is to glorify the Lord. And more specifically, for me, it is to bring my children up to know and love Him, and I have his promise that if I "train them up in the way they should go, when they are old they will not depart from it."
I am not sure exactly when it happened, but I can say that Jesus Christ is my savior. He bore my sin on the cross. He died and was raised from the dead three days later. I am saved only by His grace, and not by anything I could ever do, other than trusting in Him. Thank the Lord!
....
well there it is, the short version!
thanks for asking. =P
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